Relational aggression in teams: Practical steps for leaders and HR

Tuesday 9th Sep 2025

Image of colleagues gossipiing at the water cooler

The most damaging bullying in teams might be the kind you don’t see so easily.

When most people think of workplace bullying, they picture shouting, insults or open confrontation.
But bullying can also be subtle - hidden behind gossip, cliques and social exclusion. This is called relational aggression.

Relational aggression in teams uses relationships as the weapon. It can involve:

Gossip or spreading rumours
Excluding people from conversations or social activities
Withholding information to undermine someone
Undermining credibility through subtle digs or side comments

It’s easy to miss. It often gets dismissed as “office politics” or “personality clashes”. But it has real consequences for trust, morale and performance.

Why relational aggression in teams is harmful

Research shows relational aggression reduces psychological safety, i.e. the belief that it’s safe to speak up without fear of embarrassment or retaliation.
Teams affected by gossip and exclusion tend to:

Collaborate less effectively
Experience lower trust and engagement
Have higher turnover and absenteeism
Struggle to manage conflict constructively

Left unchecked, this behaviour can normalise itself. Over time, it becomes part of the team culture.

Practical steps to reduce relational aggression in teams

Leaders and HR professionals can take action early. Here are five steps to address it:

Name it

Make sure everyone understands that gossip, exclusion and rumours are forms of bullying, not harmless banter. Use training sessions or team briefings to explain what relational aggression looks like and why it matters.

Set the tone

Leaders must model the behaviour they expect. Avoid gossip, challenge exclusionary behaviour and address disrespect immediately. Your actions set the cultural standard.

Be transparent

Share information openly to limit speculation and rumours. Regular updates, Q&A sessions and visible decision-making processes stop misinformation from spreading.

Mix it up

Break down fixed social groups by rotating project teams and encouraging collaboration across different parts of the organisation. Inclusion reduces the power of cliques.

Act early

Step in before small incidents escalate. Have direct conversations with those involved, clarify expectations and provide support for anyone targeted.

Building a culture that doesn’t tolerate relational aggression

Preventing relational aggression in teams is about more than responding to incidents. It’s about building a culture where respect, openness and inclusion are everyday norms.

When leaders consistently challenge gossip and exclusion, encourage diverse working relationships and communicate openly, they make it harder for toxic behaviour to become embedded in the team culture.

Reference: Crothers, L. M., Lipinski, J., & Minutolo, M. C. (2009). Cliques, Rumors, and Gossip by the Water Cooler: Female Bullying in the Workplace. The Psychologist-Manager Journal, 12(4), 297–312.

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